|my son telling his family bye as he leaves for work|
(and yes, I do always have my camera with me and within reach,
just waiting for a "Kokak moment." )
I am proud of my son. Since I babysit his daughter I am in their home 4 mornings a week. I get there between 7 and 7:30 while my son and daughter-in-law (I'm proud of her too) are getting ready for work and my granddaughter is just waking up. I get to see them as they leave for the day. Their daughter has had more affection in her life than I ever dreamed actually happened between parents and kids when I was growing up. I grew up in a family where the parents never said "I love you" --- never. They didn't hug, kiss, do anything affectionate with us kids or between themselves. Ever. I always had my nose in a book but I know I didn't just miss it, I checked with my sister. She didn't receive any affectionate words or hugs either. I know my mom loved me but she just didn't say so, not in a time within my memory anyway. She wasn't a hugger. My father never once touched me in a kind way. I saw families on tv that were affectionate but that was as foreign to me as Mr. Ed the talking horse...I mean, he was on tv too but that didn't mean any horses I ever saw acted like him. I am glad I was able to break that chain in my family. When my kids were little I used to tell them if they came through a room where I was they better give me a hug on the way. One of my biggest regrets is that I was not able to ever find a husband after their father and I divorced so that they could see me and a husband having a normal, happy, affectionate relationship. My siblings were able to break the chain of "don't show any affection" as well. My parents did the best they could with the challenges they had but I am so glad my siblings and I were able to do this one thing better, and our kids are doing it even better still.